Men Can What!
by Solar Fox
Summary: After having a one night encounter of the sexual kind Harry finds himself pregnant. Only problem Harry thinks he has a wizardly STD. He eats a lot and has magical outbursts. A respronse to the *The Dursleys learn of MPREGs* by sevslittlemuffinmaker challe
1. Chapter 1

He's staring at me again

Response to this challenge:

**The Dursleys learn of MPREGs** by **sevslittlemuffinmaker**

Harry gets pregnant by Severus, but doesn't know it at first. 2. Harry doesn't know what an MPREG is 3. Harry and Sev can either be together or not 4. Harry ends up going back to the Dursleys for the summer, while pregnant 5. Harry starts showing and getting a huge appetite and is worried he might have some strange wizard's disease or something 6. Harry writes to Ron, Remus and Hermione asking for answers 7. Ron is the one who figures it out. 8. Harry tells the Dursleys, they can either freak or get all lovey dovy but they can not hurt him or kick him out. 9 Harry has to stay for the whole summer, you come up with the reason why 10. Harry conceals his preg. from everyone but Ron, Hermione and Remus. (Snape can know, if you want) 11.Harry goes into labor in the middle of the night and Ron has to help him while the other boys freak and send for help. I know it's a lot. You don't have to follow it exactly but I would love it! I really wanna see this fic!!

**Prologue **

He's staring at me again. Okay well technically it's more like glaring but I will just imagine that it's love I see in those onyx pools.

"Harry?" a voice says.

I blink and snap out of my daze.

"Hmm," I wonder what this person wants.

"Eat you little stalker," Ron says with a grin.

Ron sort of knew about my crush thing and he was okay with it even though he yelled at me and tried to beat some sense in me he came around and gave the whole "As long as you're happy I'm happy' speech. I knew Ron had liked me but what I feel for Ron is more like an 'I love you dearly not queerly thing'.

"Harry eat," he said again.

"Fine," I sighed.

Ron knows about what happened last night between me and the object of my affection (more like obsession) and I'm okay though sore. At least I used protection of both the wizard and muggle variety so no STDs for me.

Dumbledore stood and began to assign the House and Quiditch cups.

"Gryffindor and Slytherin had a tie but due to extenuating circumstances Gryffindor is awarded 100 points for the bravery shown to help a friend. So the house cup goes to Gryffindor."

"Could he have BS'd his way through that even more?" I asked.

Ron chuckled and nodded in agreement. Oh yeah I think I forgot to mention we are sort of outcasts from our house. Hermione found out I was gay and she turned the whole house against me. Ron stuck by me so right now we are sitting at the Slytherin table by Ron's soon-to-be-son. Speak of the hell hound Blaise walked up to us.

"Ronald my father told me to escort you home with me," he said.

Ron groaned. Josiah Zabini loved to be overprotective of my friend since Ron was a tad bit accident prone due to his height of 6 foot 7 inches. He was 6 foot 8 so Ron was happy. Blaise's mother had passed away over the summer and Zabini activated an old contract between the Zambini's and Weasley's. He chose Ron as his future spouse and gave Ron a weekly allowance of 500 galleons that will increase to 2000 galleons upon marriage. Ron, as a result, still dressed in his old robes that were too small and gave his family the money. Oh crap Blaise was still talking.

"Father told me to take you to buy new clothes before we go home. You will sit with me on the train and from there we will go straight to Medici's. Is that clear?" Blaise said.

Ron could only stare and I laughed. I was going to the Dursley's this summer and I couldn't wait to experience my torture. I yawned and got up to leave. Ron stood to follow me and we eventually made it to my new dwelling place. We climbed into bed together and Ron sighed as he snuggled closer to me.

"Harry do you regret what you did?"

I did not even need to ask what he was talking about. I smiled.

"No not at all. I was just happy that my wish came true. All I can hope for is that there will eventually be a repeat performance," I said with a giggle.

Ron laughed.

"Good night, Falcon" he said.

"Night, Hawk," I whispered.

We soon fell asleep in the arms of our protectors, each other.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Only one I'm doing

Disclaimer: Only one I'm doing. If you think I own this then you have not read Harry Potter. Other than the story plot all things that are known in the Harry Potter books or as specified on the HP Lexicon are not mine. Thank you. Geez if I really owned this do you think I would be wasting my time writing this.

Chapter 1

Harry groaned as he bolted to the bathroom for the fourth time that week. Oh my god is that rice! When did he last eat rice? He rinsed his mouth out and sighed. The Dursley's were feeding him better since it was his last summer with them. Call it a going away present but ever since he had been getting sick he has wondered at the possibility that they might be poisoning him. Oh wait scratch that Dudley had eaten the rest of his food last two nights.

"Freak open the damn door!"

Harry opened it and gasped as the door slammed him into the wall as Dudley rushed inside.

"I have to piss like a racehorse and all you could do was listen to me whine," he grumbled.

"S'rry," Harry said.

"Yeah right. Sorry 'bout the door though no pain right?"

Harry couldn't stop the grin from breaking free. Dudley had turned into such a softy once they got to know each other. Well soft for Dudley that is.

"Yeah no pain. Umm I need to go write a letter see you later," Harry said and moved towards his room.

His room looked even more like a dungeon now that he had gotten it painted gray trimmed in red. He moved towards his bed and pulled out some parchment and a muggle pen. He blinked in surprise as the pen's ink changed color as he wrote. What the hell was wrong with him?

zyxwvut

"BLAISE XAVIER ZABINI GET YOUR SORRY ARSE DOWN HERE NOOOOOOW!" a very irate red head screamed.

He heard chuckling behind him and blushed as tanned arms encircled his torso. A kiss was pressed to his neck and he shivered and smiled.

"What did he do?" Josiah asked.

Ron ignored him as his soon-to-be-dead-stepson walked into the room.

"Yes Mother," Blaise whispered humbly.

"DON'T YOU YES MOTHER ME YOU-YOU- UGH," Ron screamed and stormed off.

Josiah looked at his son and Blaise shrugged.

"All I did was tell him he should raise his legs higher in bed and you would go deeper. I didn't think he would go ape shit crazy," Blaise mumbled.

Josiah laughed and went to follow his irate fiancé.

aaaaaaa

"How dare that heathenistic little beast tell me such things? He makes me sooo…" Ron sighed in defeat and fought a laugh.

A fluttering of wings turned his attention towards the open window and he smiled.

"Hullo Hedwig. I hope Harry's treating you well," he said as he retrieved the letter.

He opened it and blinked at what he read.

_Dear Hawk,_

_Umm how are you and Josiah? I'm okay but I think I have a wizarding STD. I eat a lot- well more than I used to- my stomach keeps cramping causing me to vomit in the mornings and my magic just changed the pen I'm writing with pink with a sparkly feather tip. Will you write back after your research and tell me what I have? I'll go see a doctor to confirm your findings._

_Your Best Mate,_

_Falcon_

Ron blinked and then laughed as he ran to his room to respond to the letter. He failed to notice a baffled Blaise and a highly amused Josiah staring after him.

"Is he planning to kill me?" Blaise asked.

Josiah laughed and started to walk away as Blaise followed.

"Father I'm serious."

zyxwvut

Harry awoke to a flutter of wings and the sun shining into his eyes. He reached out blindly and untied the parchment from the owl by him and sat up with a groan. He looked at the letter and could only stare at the swirls in front of him. Was this some kind of joke? A hoot drew his attention and he realized he forgot his glasses on his night stand. Ahh much better so what did Ron write?

_Dear Falcon,_

_Holy shit you're fertile.-Harry blinked in confusion- Remember your one shot with Jag-oh yeah he remembered- did you use contraceptives. –Harry laughed of course not he wasn't a girl- Well in the wizarding world witches and wizards are split into two groups. Most men are dominate while most females are submissive but rarely magic creates Pulchrum. Pulchrum are men who have the insides of a female and therefore they can reproduce. Since you did not grow up in the wizarding world you were not tested at age 5. I was and so out of my brothers I was chosen by Josiah for this ability. Only pureblood dominates carry this gene so since your father was pureblood he passed it to you. Rarely a submissive can carry the gene but this only happens if magic recognizes they are the last of their line. I already made an appointment for you for Wednesday at 13:00 with Tyler Zabini my cousin-in-law. I will pick you up on Tuesday and you will stay until Sunday and I or Josiah will return you to you home. _

_Sincerely Your Best Mate,_

_Hawk_

_P.S. Congratulations on your pregnancy._

Harry blinked and sighed. Trust him not to be normal.

"BOYS TIME FOR DINNER!" Uncle Vernon yelled.

Harry walked slowly downstairs and took his seat at the table. After grace was said, they ate their meal in silence. Soon it was dessert time and everyone asked about each others day. Soon it was Harry's turn.

"Well I learned that men can become pregnant if they are wizards," Harry whispered.

Silence reigned for a short time and soon Harry heard Uncle Vernon intake air.

"MEN CAN WHAT!"


End file.
